Burger King sells 2.1 billion original Whoppers each year, and the new Impossible (meat free) Whopper will cost $1 more, meaning that if they can convert half of those sales to the meat free alternative, then BK will make a billion more dollars.
That’s almost impossible to fathom, but the new Whopper is socially conscious and…wait for it…boasts a smaller carbon footprint, using 95% less land and 74% less water.
Restaurant Brands, US/NYSE: QSR
I can see this happening. Everybody today says they are very concerned about the planet’s survival, and I fully expect concerned fast-fooders will opt for the new planet-saving burger, which is responsible for 87% less greenhouse gas emissions than the old humanity-hating beef Whopper.
The way I understand it is plants don’t fart as often as cows, so we can all breathe a bit easier, knowing we can last longer than 12 more years. I’m no science guy, but that sounds like a pretty good deal. And here I thought “have it your way” just meant extra pickles. Who knew? I can get extra pickles AND a smaller carbon footprint AND existential survival. So cool.
Earth is over 4.5 billion years old.
We deserve more than 12 years, right?
Do your part.
Choke that meat free sucker down with a raw organic potato, and plunge a paper straw into that eco-friendly radish soda, and you can help save our planet from certain extinction by exercising socially conscious fast fooding.
- #iwillgladlypayyoutuesdayforexistentialsurvivaltoday
- #extrapickles
- #wheresthebeef
- #baconkilssbutittastessodamngood
*This post is not a recommendation to invest in stock, livestock or vegan burgers